Mish Goes To Town

I’m basically a small town girl.

Sure, I grew up in the Capitol City but to call Frankfort a “city” is really a stretch.  Frankfort actually doubles in population during the week because of state government, but on the weekends, we’re just a small town.

Yesterday my family traveled to the big city of Lexington because my dad was having a cardiac procedure.

Everything went well and he’s fine but whenever you take us small town folk to the big city, stuff is bound to happen.

And Mish is bound to find it funny.

The Mr. had to work so I was on my own to get to Lexington.  I asked Molly if we could ride together and she said sure but reminded me that she has no a/c in her car.

NO A/C IN HER CAR.

Well, that’s not hapnin’!!

Now before you go thinking that I’m an a/c snob, let me just tell you that I can live and even travel with no a/c (with some complaint!) but the end result is a hairdo much like Rod Stewart and since we were going to be in the public, I figured that was just too much!!!

So I decided that I would be big and brave and just drive us there myself.

We got to the hospital just in time to see Dad before they wheeled him away and that’s when I discovered that his doctor was Doogie Howser.

He was a little kid!!

It’s very disconcerting when your doctor and your preacher are younger than you.

It’s just wrong!!!

Anyway, we sat and waited and visited in the waiting room for a couple of hours and then we met with Doogie about the details (I love me some details) and instructions.

Then they wheeled Dad back in.  Bless his heart was he groggy!!!  But his hair was still perfectly coiffed.

How that man can get his fine-as-frog-hair ‘do to get that much height is beyond me.  No one else can duplicate it but it’s basically been the same as long as I can remember.

Check it out:

Dad recent

2000’s

Dad past 2

1980’s

Same hair!!

{He’s gonna fuss at me because he’s lost a lot of weight since that more recent picture.}

One of the male nurses came in to see how he was doing and Dad kind of roused up a little.  The guy patted Dad’s foot and said “You’re going to need to be a couch potato for a while” and Dad mumbled something.  The nurse asked him to repeat what he said, so he did:

“Are you going to put butter and sour cream on me?”

We just cracked up!

Dad doesn’t remember that at all.

Once he was ready to be transferred to a regular room, Marti and Molly went out (in the pouring rain) to get us some burgers for lunch.  We decided to eat in the waiting room since there was only one chair in his room and Mom wasn’t budging!

The waiting room was a nice place with windows all around the room so you could see out in the hall but it was behind closed doors.  Probably because they knew we would be rowdy!  There were several men scattered around the room and no one had turned on the TV so it was pretty quiet.

That right there stumped me.

How can so many men sit in a room with a TV and not turn it on????

Then I noticed there was no remote.

‘Nuf said!

There were several vending machines and a little alcove with a counter and storage underneath.  Molly goes over to clean her hands with the hand sanitizer hanging on the wall.  We had seen these dispensers all over the hospital.

She pumps a bunch on her hands and starts rubbing them together.  As she’s getting lathery she looks at us and says “This is soap”.

“What??”

“This is soap. ”

“It’s not hand sanitizer.”

“It’s soap.”

“There’s no sink.”

“There’s no water.”

“Where is the sink?”

“This is soap!”

At this point, the men are coming awake and starting to snicker.

Marti and I, on the other hand, are full out laughing at her!!!

She’s just standing there with her soapy hands in the air looking for a sink!!

We told her to just go to the bathroom.

“I can’t open the door!!!”

It was like an Abbott and Costello skit in there!

We laughed and laughed at her running up and down the hall looking for a sink!

While she was gone, Marti started to divvy up the food.  By this point we were all starving so I didn’t care who ordered what JUST GIVE ME FOOD!!!

Marti peeks in the first burger but, no, it’s not mine.  She sticks it in the crook of her arm and continues to dig in the bag.

I had just said “don’t drop your burger” when…….

PLOP!

Right in the floor!!!

Marti looks up at me and says, “Don’t worry.  That’s Molly’s!!”

By now we’re laughing so hard, we’ve driven all the men from the room.

I guess they just couldn’t take the antics of these small town girls!!

~Mish~

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