Archive | July 2013

Hey! That’s Not Funny!!

laugh_ha_ha

I’ve hit a dry spell.

And I don’t just mean my elbow; though it’s pretty dry, too!

I mean, I can’t find the funny.

I’m really not sure what the deal is.

I love funny.

I LIVE for funny.

WHERE IS THE BLOOMIN’ FUNNY?????

We just got back from NY and you would think that trip alone would trigger some humorous moments,

The language barrier alone should have me laughing til I cry.

Oh sure, there were things that made me chuckle (like the toll taker who said “hiya” or the way the Mr. and his family say “happy” with too many syllables) but nothing really laugh out loud funny.

So if your here for the funny, you best just keep on walking.

Ain’t gonna happen.

Nothing funny here.

Nothing that would even cause you to snicker.

Nothing that makes you snort Diet Coke out of your nostrils.

Nothing.

Except maybe this…….

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~Mish~

 

TGIF

I snapped this picture of Taj this morning:

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I told the Mr. that I wasn’t sure if he was thinking:

“Mom, please stay home with me today”

or

“Would you get out of here already!!”

The Mr., in all his wisdom, said “He’s a boy.  He’s not thinking anything.”

Truer words were never spoken!

Happy Friday, ya’ll.

~Mish~

Animal House

Animal_House

I cannot express to you how much better I’m feeling.

Apparently the sickness has run its course and I’m almost back to normal.

I say almost because I’m exhausted today from partying last evening with a bunch of church women until all hours of the night and day.

Actually it was about 10:00 when I got home but by Mish-Standard-Time, that’s hooka late.

By the time I got in bed it was pert-near 11:30!!

So my tail-feathers are draggin’ today.

And we’ve gotta do it all over again tonight.

I may be old for this crowd.

Or maybe too Baptist.

I’m not sure which.

I do, however, think that my self-diagnosed West Nile may be coming to an end.

Which is a good thing but things around the Mahal have been a little strange lately.

More strange than normal.

First of all, it has rained and poured for forty daysies-daysies!!!

I mean, it has POURED!

And RAINED!

And the water just kept a-comin’ up and a-comin’ up!

We had to drain water from our pool 2 times in 3 days.

Now that’s just too much rain, in my opinion.

Not that anyone asked my opinion, but there it is.

Last Wednesday evening, during a small little break in the deluge, Taj saw something out the front window.  He was sitting on the back of my chair, very cat-like, and started to bark.  The Mr. turned to see what it was and said there was a cat outside.  So I had to look too and pulled the curtain back for better viewing.

{Apparently shears can even be too much for Mrs. Magoo to see through.}

{I know, it’s sad!}

Indeed there was a big ole black cat with the most beautiful, intense eyes at the end of our driveway.

{The eyes weren’t at the end of our driveway, the cat was.}

{Well, actually the eyes were with the cat so I guess they were.}

{Whatever!}

black car

And those eyes were locked onto my little Taj.

Of course, being the instigator that I am, I started telling Taj “watch out; that cat’s gonna get you; he’s coming after you, buddy” which really freaked him out.

Funny thing was, that cat WAS coming after him!!

That cat was slinking up our driveway, never taking his eyes off of Taj.  As he got closer to the window, Taj started backing up!!

He’s big and brave…….to a point.

Like his mom.

So the Mr. opened the front door and we all ran to look out as the cat prowled by, all the while staring eyeball to eyeball with the dog.

Next we went into the Mr.’s office and looked out onto the side porch and sure enough there was that cat waiting for us.  He stood there, eyes locked onto Taj just wagging his tail back and forth!

Then the Mr. said the strangest thing…..

“Should we give him some food???”

Give him food????

Is he nuts???

Do we want a cat???

The answer is most resoundingly NO!

So a couple of days go by and once again, we sent out a dove and when it didn’t drown in the downpour, we decided to go out to drain some water from our now-too-full pool.

While it was draining, the Mr. decided to go empty the filter basket.

And there it was…..

Floating in the basket……

Big as you please…..

The cat version of a horse head in the bed….

A dead bird!!!

IN THE FILTER BASKET!!!

So what does the Mr. say???

“You better get that bird out of there”.

Are you kidding me????

Who was the smart-guy who begged for this pool in the first place?

Who was the eager-beaver who promised to take care of the pool?

Oh yeah………it was me!!

Oops!!!

Now you already know about my “love” of birds so I was none too enthusiastic to reach my hand in there to get out that floater.

Besides the fact that when I first looked down in that basket it looked like a headless bird.

{No worries, the head was just tucked down where I couldn’t see it.}

{Did I really just say “no worries” about a headless bird????}

{Weird!}

I decided I needed a glove.

I went in the kitchen and way up under the sink I found an old pink rubber glove.

Perfect.

This will be my new clean-the-dead-stuff-out-of-the-filter glove.

I tried to be breezy about the whole thing because I didn’t want the Mr. to see that I was freaked out so I grabbed a plastic grocery sack and bravely walked out to the filter with my pink glove.

After a couple of deep cleansing breaths, I reached in with my pink-gloved hand and as quick as you please, I pulled out that dead bird and shoved it in the bag.

Easy-peasy.

But there were still feathers and bugs and leaves in the basket so I reached in one more time and scooped out the rest.

That’s when I noticed it.

A hole.

In my pink glove!

So maybe it wasn’t the West Nile.

Maybe it was the Bird Flu!!!

~Mish~

 

Summer Sickness

I’ve got the sickness.

No, I’m not actually sick of summer.

Not yet.

But I’ve got something.

Yesterday the Mr. was feeling puny and today it’s hit me hard.

I thought maybe it was the Summer Flu because I feel achy and headache-ish and generally yucky.

I’m also more drained than usual.  I just can’t seem to get enough sleep.

Last night we went to bed while it was still light outside and aside from a trip to the bathroom around 4:15 which resulted in a “splash” (thanks, Mr. for leaving the seat up!!), I slept really good.

But I feel like I didn’t get one bit of rest.

During the week, my alarm goes off at 6:00 am and the Mr. gets to sleep until 6:20 am.  That’s 20 minutes of bed-to-himself-no-Mish-or-Taj time that I don’t get.

Not that I’m jealous or anything!!

Now Taj is not a super cuddly dog.  He likes his space (like his mom!) but in the morning, he’s all about the snuggle.  He will stretch and nestle against me and yawn and lick and just be a sweet little doggie.  I love it!!

The Mr. does NOT!

I learned the hard way that he doesn’t appreciate the mommy-doggie time during his 20 minutes of extra sleep.

So I’ve taken to getting on the floor next to Taj’s bed for snuggle time.

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It works out pretty good.

Until today.

When the alarm went off this morning, I stumbled over and turned it off then got right on the floor and rested my head on Taj’s bed.  I rubbed his tummy and scratched his ears and he stretched and tried to lick me to death.

Then the alarm went off.

The Mr.’s alarm.

It was 6:20.

I had fallen asleep in the dog bed!!!

Taj was laying across the room so no telling how long I had been asleep.

I don’t know much in this life but I do know that if you fall asleep laying in a dog bed, your pretty darn tired!!!

What could be causing this kind of fatigue?

I checked the internet for symptoms of Summer Flu.  I had heard that it was going around town though I didn’t even know it was a thing.  I figured it was the same as a Winter Flu but it’s not.  Not even close.

The Summer Flu is gastrointestinal.

Scratch that.

Not the Summer Flu.

Then what could it be???

Could it be that the Mr. and I have been working so much out in the yard in the hotter-than-hades-heat that my old body has just said ENOUGH!?!?!?!?!

Well, that couldn’t possibly be it!!

Then I stumbled on the answer.

Actually the Mr. sent me this information yesterday when he was feeling sick and after looking at the symptoms, I’m positive this is what I’ve got.

The symptoms of a mild case are:

  • Fever
  • Headache
  • Body aches
  • Fatigue
  • Back pain
  • Skin rash (occasionally)
  • Swollen lymph glands (occasionally)
  • Eye pain (occasionally)

HELLO!!!

I’ve got most of that!!!

I’ve even got one of the symptoms of the serious case….a stiff neck!!!

Even though the CDC shows absolutely no reported cases in Kentucky, I’ve got it.

WNV Map

West Nile!!!

Stupid mosquitoes.

~Mish~

 

Midnight Snacking

You may remember that back in March, our not-so-slender Taj was told by the vet that he was a little chunky.

Poor guy.

He gets that from his mother.

Anyway, we immediately put him on a diet.  We bought some dry food and some moist food from the vet.

Doesn’t that sound yummy?

Just what you want in a food…….MOIST!

Anyway, Taj loves the canned food but could care less about the dry.  In fact he carries it around and deposits it all over the house.

He’s such a messy eater.

He gets that from his mother as well.

I’ve been back to the vet’s office many times in the last few months to get more canned food but he’s still working on that 6 lb. bag of dry.

A few weeks ago I ran out of canned food and just didn’t have time to stop at the vet’s for more so I had to resort to the good ole Beneful that he always ate before.  I had stocked up right before he got put on a diet.

So for about a week, Taj chowed down on his favorites from the past.

He LOVED it!!

And for those few days I noticed something kinda strange.

I was having to refill the dry food almost every day.

Weird.

Then for a few mornings in a row, I came down to the kitchen and his bowl was completely empty!!!

He ate it ALL!!

I knew the bowl had dry food in it at bedtime so Taj must have been sneaking down to snack in the middle of the night.

Poor little guy…..he must have been starving!!

But once I got him back on the diet food, all that midnight snacking stopped.

The Mr. and I have been noticing that Taj has been really sniffy around the Mr.’s desk.  Whenever we’re in his office, Taj will smell all around one side of the desk.  I’m not sure what he’s smelling because the desk legs go all the way down to the floor.

It’s been sort of bizarre.

Until the Mr. did some investigating.

This past Wednesday night, the Mr. was on his computer and Taj was once again sniffing all around the desk.  Ever the curious sort, the Mr. decided to take the bottom drawer out of the desk so see what in the world Taj was smelling.

And here is what he found:

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A big ole pile of dry food!!!

Look at all that…..

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How in this world did that food get in there????

The only way to get under that drawer is by a little crack between the desk and the wall.

But there it was.

Proof that we had another critter among us.

We first thought it was a mouse.

But there was no tell-tale “droppings”.

I’ve seen no evidence of a mouse.

I know what you’re thinking….how is Mrs. Magoo gonna see mouse poop????

Well, the Mr. hadn’t seen any either so we figure it’s not a mouse.

And then we remembered……

Last Saturday when we were working in the yard, we turned around and there on the sidewalk not 5 feet away from us was Chip and Dale.

The chipmunks, not the strippers!!!

chipndale

For a split second, the four of us froze…..me, the Mr., Chip and Dale.

Then they took off.

One back the way he came across the walk, and the other dove into a hole beside the house.

{I’m not sure which one was which because they didn’t sing their usual “I’m Chip, I’m Dale” song}

{That would have been AWESOME!!!!}

And so now we think maybe these two little cuties may be the food thieves.

We’re not really sure what to do now but since it’s been raining like crazy this week, we’re on the lookout for Donald Duck next.

I’ll keep you updated!  🙂

~Mish~