Giant Stinkers, Helicopters and an Actual Giant

Some of you may have noticed that I’ve been a little lax in the blogging department and I do sincerely apologize.

The thing is, most of the time I write these in my head early in the morning or late at night and then I either forget to actually post them to the interweb or, in my old age, I think I’ve already done it!!

So it got me thinking about some things I was going to write about and I remembered promising a post about giant stinkers.

And then I didn’t do it.

And who among us wouldn’t want to read about giant stinkers?????

For the past few years, we’ve noticed an abundance of mosquitoes in our backyard.

Like, they are THICK!!

We’ve checked and double-checked for standing water and just couldn’t find any.

Until the Mr. decided it was time to clean the gutters.

I would never have thought to clean the gutters because frankly they are too high up for me to notice.

Or clean.

So that good ole Mr. climbed up to have a look-see and, lo AND behold, those suckers were FULL.

Full of water and helicopters!

You know the ones I mean.

mapleseed

We have a big ole maple tree in our yard and it’s been tossing helicopters at us for years and those guys were clogging up the gutters and causing all kinds of problems.

Well, that Mr. got out his new pressure washer (he has since pressure washed EVERYTHING!!) and got to work shooting that clog out of the gutters.

And out it came.

Down the spout and onto the ground.

And do you know what decomposing helicopters look like?

Well, I’d be glad to tell you but I’m starting to gag at the memory so I’ll let you use your imagination.

Suffice it to say the goo that came out was blacker than pitch and quite chunky!

And do you know what decomposing helicopters smell like????

Yep!

GIANT STINKERS!!!!

The only one at our house who wasn’t totally grossed out was Taj. He tried every way in this world to roll around in that nasty pile.

I don’t know where he learned such a thing.

It’s almost like he’s a dog.

Anyway, once the Mr. was done and the gutters were nice and cleaned out, do you know where those mosquitoes ended up for the summer?

OUR HOUSE!

Because apparently, the Mr. and I taste delicious!!

Giant stinkers got me thinking about an encounter with an ACTUAL giant. And I hope I haven’t already shared this. I’ve started to many times but I think (I THINK) I haven’t done it yet.

So in honor of my friend Cara Sue’s birthday….

Her 50th birthday…..

As in……….she’s FIFTY……

I thought I’d share this story about her and the day she was trapped by a giant.

(Cara, you’re welcome!) 🙂

When we were in high school, lo these many years ago, there was a fella named Terry (I think) and he was a football player. He was HUGE!!!

And they called him Sasquatch.

sasquatch

One day my friend Cara was walking down the hall between classes and it was very crowded. People were everywhere.

Now, if you’re petite, then you know exactly what I’m saying here but let me tell the rest of you Amazon people that when you can’t see above the crowd, you’ve got to just weave in and out of folks as best you can. The bad part is that most of the time, the Talls can’t see you and your weaving.

And that’s what happened to Cara.

As she, Miss 4’11”, was bobbing and weaving passed Sasquatch and his gargantuan friends, he lowered his arm and there was my little friend.

Caught.

In the armpit of Sasquatch.

I’m not sure how long she was trapped there but I don’t think Sasquatch ever noticed she was there and eventually released her to scurry on her way.

So let that be a lesson to all of you out there who are 5’ tall or less……..always watch out for Bigfoot when navigating a crowded hallway.

And also…………happy 50th birthday, Cara Sue!!

~Mish~

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