Archive | March 2016

The Wearing of the Green

st pattys

This morning as I was getting ready for work, I remembered a long ago St. Patrick’s Day that I’d just as soon forget.

It was a bad day.

It was a VERY bad day.

And it was, without a doubt, the most painful St. Patrick’s Day of my entire existence.

That year, St. Patty’s Day fell on a Sunday.

This was back in the day when people actually dressed up for church.

No jeans and t-shirts.

No shorts and flip-flops.

Men wore a tie and/or sports coat and women wore dresses or skirts. Apparently, I didn’t own a green dress OR skirt so I put a little green pin on my blouse and headed to the Lord’s house.

After Sunday School, I was headed to the sanctuary when I suddenly got the urge to visit the water fountain.

BIG mistake!!

There in that little, crowded hallway, as I’m pushing my way through, I encounter a young child on a mission.

What was the calling on this small child?

Was it the Lord’s work?


This kid thought it was up to him to pinch anyone he saw not wearing green.

Couldn’t he see my pin?

Didn’t he know I was participating in the St. Patrick’s Day tradition?

Well, apparently NOT!

That little booger pinched a plug outta my arm!

I mean, he really got in there and got me good!

I may or may not have been bruised and I most definitely WAS scarred…..for life!

After what I’m sure was a perfectly lady-like scream, I believe I may have threatened that precious monster with a beating.

I’m not sure.

I blacked out a little from the sheer pain.

Of course, I blamed his parents for his poor behavior.

No, that’s not true.

His momma was doing the best she could with that one.

No, the blame fell squarely on the dad.

This kid was a chip off the old blockhead!

But I learned a valuable lesson that day.

When it’s St. Patrick’s Day, you put on a big ole green shirt and avoid the pinches like the plague!

And that’s what I did today.

So, whatever became of that “brat”???

Why, he grew up to be one of my most favorite people in the whole wide world.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day, Ryan Tingle! 🙂