Mystery in the Forks

Next week is a milestone for the Mr.

Yep, he turns the big 5-0.

I asked him one day how I ended up married to such an old man.

He quickly informed me that I would be joining the elderly ranks just a few short weeks after him.

He sure knows how to burst a girl’s bubble!!

Anyway, as time is quickly marching on, I’ve noticed that the older we get, the more like our parents we become.

The thing that bugs me is that we don’t get to pick the characteristics of our parents that we get.

Did I get the never-ending patience that Dad has?

Did I get the warm, hospitable kindness that Mom displays?

That would be a big, fat NO!

What I did get is the crazy, jump right to conclusions side of…….one of my parents.

Now, I’m not dumb enough to tell you WHICH parent does this but just know that if any of us were ever late coming home, ONE of my parent’s would be sitting in the dark kitchen with a phone book ready to call around looking for us.

Because she (OR he) was sure that we had wrapped our car around a tree.

That one came up quite often.

Never mind that traffic may be heavy.

Never mind that we lost track of time.

This parental unit would jump straight to “car wrapped around tree”.

It used to be kinda funny…….back before I started doing the same thing.

Woe be unto the Mr. if he is late with no call or text.

Yep, must be wrapped around a tree.

Heaven forbid the boys be a little late coming home from work.

Wrapped around a tree.

But even though I know I do it, I just can’t stop my crazy mind from going there.

And yesterday, it happened once again.

It all started last week when I completely flaked on my hair appointment.

Christi (my cousin) told me she could do my hair on the 11th.

What did I write on my calendar????

The 17th.

Senior moment.

So we finally got it worked out that I would come to her shop yesterday at 2:00.

I get to the lot and see Christi’s car there.

{And thankfully, no other car because I don’t like to share my Christi time.  If someone else is there, how are we to gossip catch up????}

So I go to the door and it’s locked.

Or is it??

I’m not the strongest person in the world so I tried the knob again.

Yep, definitely locked.

Now where could that girl be????

It’s the middle of the bloomin’ day!!

So I knock.

No answer.

Then I call her cell.

No answer.

This is strange.

Her car is right there!

Now, I’d like to say I immediately thought that she may be out with someone else for a late lunch or that she’s having a private potty moment and locked the door so a crazy woman didn’t just walk in, but, oh no, I went straight to MURDER!!!

Yep, there I stand, banging on the door and calling her cell phone while my sweet cousin is laying in the shop all kinds of hurt or dead.

What do I do????

I don’t have her husband’s number.

But I do have her sister’s number.

I’ll call Judy.

Or should I call Uncle Raymond??

I mean, Uncle Raymond can come bust down the door.

Of course, if I’m wrong (though I’m probably not) I’m liable to get the infamous McLean Brother Side Eye.

If you’ve never seen it, it’s the look that says “you’ve completely lost your mind and how can we even be related?”

side eye

No, I better stick with Judy.

She can get one of her boys to come and help.

Just as I’m looking up Judy’s number, a car pulls in.

Nope, not Christi.

I’m thinking that now I’ll have to explain to this customer that poor Christi has been murdered and the murderer locked the door behind him when he escaped.

Suddenly, another car pulls in.

The driver waves.


Hallelujah, she’s safe.

She’s also in Suzanna’s car.

Now, I think it’s important to point out that this all happened within a span of about a minute.

She got there at 2:01.

Silly me.

I think I need to ease up on the murder shows on TV a bit.

And I definitely need to give myself the Side Eye!!




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